CONFUSED

I am totally confused.
In the beginning the single women wore saffron saris
and the single men wore saffron dhotis.
The householder men wore yellow dhotis.
Older unmarried women wore white saris.
Now anyone can wear anything.
I have no idea at all what to wear
If I were to ever again visit
an ISKCON temple.

Everyone was addressed as prabhu.
Godsisters, godbrothers. everyone was prabhu.
Now if I say prabhu to a godsister it's weird.
Didi was out of the question. Sister was a no no.
Mataji. Then all the women were mataji.
Even the matajis called each other mataji.
I have no idea how to address anyone.
"He you?"

Which books should I read?
The original books all full of nasty "warts."
Or the new edited books with thousands and thousands of
"corrections and improvements?"

What food should I offer to Krishna?
Heavily spiced and cooked foods?
Vegetarian Western foods?
Vegan foods?
Maybe just don't cook at all.
Offer nuts and fruits?

How can I tell anyone about Krishna consciousness?
Who am I?
I was initiated by Srila Prabhupada
but people don't know what I'm talking about.
I definitely sound crazy to them.
What books should I give them?
What prasadam should I share with them?
Where should I tell them go
if they want to find a program or a class?

Where is the Harinam sankirtan?
Why are the temples filled with Indians?
Why are the pujaris and cooks paid employees?

All the temples are saying different things.
All the devotees are arguing this way and that.
All in disagreement which way is the right way.

Krishna West,
Hindu ISKCON
Ritvik
Independent little gatherings here and there.

What a mess!!!

I have no idea at all how to serve Srila Prabhupada.
Who to trust, who to listen to.
And if I honestly express my misery
ISKCON and everybody else jumps down my throat..

I think you are all in Maya.